For all things Tooks, and some things, er, relating to other people. As well as to other things. You get the picture.

20 April 2004

wow. a whole month since my last blog. things have changed. i'm a year older now. i have a goatee and sideburns instead of a full(er) beard. my corporate sellout haircut is getting shaggy around the edges (which goes with my shaggy (i.e., scooby doo-style) goatee. like, far out, scoob.

i miss the red sox a lot. i get this emailed update from the globe after every game that is pretty cool, especially since the writer(s) shamelessly refer(s) to the yankees as the evil empire. it's pretty funny, really. but no substitute for being able to watch those lovable non-winners-of-the-world-series whenever i want as i could in the bay state. it's funny, though: i never really got too enthused about red sox baseball until last year's playoffs. now i can watch texas play anaheim and it's entertaining. not like watching the sox, but it will do. actually, that's why i got a tv--to watch baseball, and football when the time comes. (plus to watch dvd's. but that's beside the point.)

this is the most boring blog i have written to date. i will now proceed to supply random facts about my life to date. (some of these will be boring, too). treat it like a little quiz, asking yourself after each question, did i know that? if you can answer yes to each one, you are my girlfriend, since she is the only one who will, and perhaps not even her. peer into the musty recesses of my soul, and marvel:

1) i have no health insurance right now, for which reason, murphy's law-style, disaster is soon to befall me physically, emotionally, spiritually, and perhaps most devastatingly of all, financially.

2) i have half a loaf of banana bread in my refrigerator right now baked for me by a person i do not know and hung from my apartment door when i wasn't looking.

3) my three favorite tv shows are fox's 24 and the wb's smallville. they are also the only two tv shows i try to watch. chappelle's show on comedy central is fantastic, but it's on at a tough time, so i don't see it much.

4) i hate the "the" in "the wb." it's not "the abc" or "the fox." for goodness's sake.

5) i grind my teeth furiously in my sleep, so much so that they have become very sensitive. i use sensodyne toothpaste on the recommendation of dr. pilar ortiz, a colombian dentist.

6) the hair on the left side of the back of my neck grows much faster than the hair on the right side. luckily, it's very blonde back there. otherwise, i'd have to shave it all the time. as it is, it's somewhat mane-like. (shut up, peanut gallery. the days of the tail are long forgotten, and i'll thank you to leave them that way.)

7) i am not to be trusted with pens, especially nice ones. i either get ink all over my pants or i lose them. they should just give me a dark rock and a slab of concrete to scrape on.

8) i love tupac's "california love." the video is excellent--mad max in compton. also, george clinton is in it. he plays himself.

9) my favorite video of all time is also one of the first i ever saw, in my childhood: billy idol's "cradle of love." i saw it in old orchard beach, maine.

10) i love fried dough.

11) i have eaten under five corn dogs in my life, and possibly under three.

12) i have a strong, strong thing for cheez-its.

13) by a very narrow margin--the narrowest--i prefer cats to dogs. in the same way, i prefer the company of women to that of men, except to watch sports. (obviously.)

14) one of the funniest things ever said by a member of the bancroft community in my hearing remains dave hatch's "smells like girl in here" in boca raton, florida. classic. the second funniest thing is bob stein's joke about mickey and minnie in divorce court.

15) i have a thing for grand theft auto and world cup soccer on playstation. my funnest gaming experience, though, is clearly fay school summer 2003, steiner, timesplitters. 4-eva.

16) i sang the song "help me rhonda" today for the first time in recent memory. it was strangely satisfying.

17) i still think craig kilborn edges out jon stewart as daily show host. i know no one else who shares my conviction.

18) i accidently broke two staplers in two hours in april. i subsequently was able to fix one. the second remains broken.

19) i live in mortal fear of rats at work, and yet i feel sad that they will soon be dying in horrible agony in the traps that the orkin man set.

20) i think nirvana is way, way overrated. van morrison is underrated by the same amount.

21) when i tried to take the awful awful challenge at newport creamery in worcester in the late 90s, i almost threw up in the bathroom.