How great is target? it always has everything you need and more at sickeningly, mom-and-pop-store-annihilatingly low prices, just like walmart. but target's way cooler than walmart. there an ironic vibe to the place, a very hip sort of air that says, in a tone not quite sarcastic but pretty cutting nonetheless, "sure. you can find bargains here. sure." you feel slightly uncool for not quite grasping exactly what it's trying to say, but also much cooler just being around it. kinda like dennis miller. the thing i really don't get, though, is the red theme. i get the obvious connection--bullseyes, the center of a target, are red--but why an all-red color scheme would help sales is beyond me. it's always seemed a little creepy to me, really, especially the red christmas trees in the commercial that's been on tv lately. it's like how shopping would be in hell. "chimney-sweeping logs, sir? of course, aisle 14, just past the pool of boiling blood and to the left of the bottomless pit. yes, ma'am? certainly, we have yanni cds. you'll find them--in fact that's all you'll find--in the music section, not far from the food court. look for the giant rotisserie filled with writhing, roasting sinners. you're welcome, and have a great day. and remember: here in hell, we're burning to serve you!"

repent with me,
TR